Life and it's vagaries
I never thought that life will give me so much...when I left Alain after 32 years, life was one big lot of Emptiness for I did not want to leave Alain..a woman is never allowed her individuality...should she always toe the line ? Can she not be respected for her feelings and the man agree to her views? That was not in my wish list.. I toed the line and started packing..then came the US trip...that was again enjoyable when I merged my mood with that of the others in the family..routine of a different kind... It was just that there were two masters instead of one..my son... He is now an adult and an earning member..so there goes his whims and fancies...the difference in attitude and his thinking took me by surprise.. Yet he was sweet enough to keep me happy by being a dutiful son and pampering me at all levels..enjoyed it to the hilt and started back to chennai to open my next innings..the first few days went in adjusting to the new lifestyle ...hari was my new attraction and I got completely bowled over by his mimics and questions.. A good time pass...he made my days challenging.. I started going back to the days when rekha and anand were kids.. Started learning English, maths, evs , Hindi and all that goes with the CBSE curriculum...there I was getting hari ready to face the age -old exam practice.nothing has changed in these 32 years...same syllabus... Same model of testing..same outlook..it is tiring..
I thought I will have a different lifestyle now.. I shall have time for myself...no... That was not to be.. Here I am grounded by realities... It is a new world.. I have to keep track of people, near and dear ones, their mood swings, their expectations...some where in this the Sara's I was dreaming to see has got LOST?..will I be able to find her? I don't think so...
I never thought that life will give me so much...when I left Alain after 32 years, life was one big lot of Emptiness for I did not want to leave Alain..a woman is never allowed her individuality...should she always toe the line ? Can she not be respected for her feelings and the man agree to her views? That was not in my wish list.. I toed the line and started packing..then came the US trip...that was again enjoyable when I merged my mood with that of the others in the family..routine of a different kind... It was just that there were two masters instead of one..my son... He is now an adult and an earning member..so there goes his whims and fancies...the difference in attitude and his thinking took me by surprise.. Yet he was sweet enough to keep me happy by being a dutiful son and pampering me at all levels..enjoyed it to the hilt and started back to chennai to open my next innings..the first few days went in adjusting to the new lifestyle ...hari was my new attraction and I got completely bowled over by his mimics and questions.. A good time pass...he made my days challenging.. I started going back to the days when rekha and anand were kids.. Started learning English, maths, evs , Hindi and all that goes with the CBSE curriculum...there I was getting hari ready to face the age -old exam practice.nothing has changed in these 32 years...same syllabus... Same model of testing..same outlook..it is tiring..
I thought I will have a different lifestyle now.. I shall have time for myself...no... That was not to be.. Here I am grounded by realities... It is a new world.. I have to keep track of people, near and dear ones, their mood swings, their expectations...some where in this the Sara's I was dreaming to see has got LOST?..will I be able to find her? I don't think so...
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